Friday, March 21, 2008

She Hasn't Repressed This One, Careless Memory #9

A Glimpse into a Writer's Life
Now this story isn't from her childhood, so it's not so difficult to imagine it being unrepressed, but it still qualifies as a glimpse into a writer's life. She told this story at the Author Island chat* Monday (St. Patrick's Day) when it was far more appropriate than today, but I don't know when you all celebrate your societal holidays, so I deserve a break.

When my fantasy author, Sandy Lender, graduated from college, she started a job at a company that shall remain nameless to protect the people in this story. She worked with several women, two of whom were obsessed with food.

These two women were rather cruel, and Sandy did not enjoy working with them. On days when the company would have potluck lunches…wait… (what's a—okay, will they all know what that is?) Excellent. On days when the company would have potluck lunches, these ladies would usually complain or mock what other people brought to the table.

One of them volunteered Sandy to prepare baked potatoes for a "potato bar" for the office at one of these functions, and actually yelled at Sandy for using too much aluminum foil to wrap the first baked potato. Then the woman stood over her to make sure she wrapped the rest of them correctly before watching her place them in the oven. These ladies also raised a ruckus when the Christmas party planning committee arranged to serve ham as the main course (the ladies thought it should have been beef, and made this clear to the president of the company). One of the ladies, while at a group luncheon one afternoon, requested a doggie bag to take the free chips and salsa from the table back home so she'd have a snack that evening. Sandy's list of their bizarre food fetish examples goes on, but, to get to the specific memory that you readers are going to enjoy, I'll move on.

One St. Patrick's Day, Sandy baked and decorated cupcakes to bring to the office. By decorating, I mean she poured a great portion of a bottle of green food coloring into a can of white icing, stirred it into a soupy, bright green mess, and smeared it on the cupcakes. It was "vivid", she tells me. "It was vivid like a bright green shamrock in a bright green field of shamrocks." (She's actually giggling as she tells me the story…)

Anyway, she forewarned her "normal" co-workers, set the plate of green goodies down, and waited for the aftermath. It took a couple of the sugary confections before the two ladies noticed each other's mouths, but when they did, it was too late. They had green teeth, green gums, green tongues, green lips…Sandy says it's like a leprechaun had shat in their mouths.

(What's a leprechaun?)

Remind me not to piss Sandy off. I'd hate to see Amanda Chariss with green lips in any of the Choices Meant for Gods sequels…

*footnote: The Author Island chat is a monthly opportunity for readers to "meet" authors online at Several authors participate, offer free excerpts from their books, offer books or other prizes through contests through their Web sites or the Author Island site that day, and make announcements pertinent to new releases. The hostess, DeNita Tuttle also arranges for a moderator to gather a series of recipes shared throughout the day and make them available at a later date on the Author Island site. The conversations range from all topics, but tend to focus on books and whatever questions the readers bring to the group. More information about the experience is available at the site.

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